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Sex in the shower? For a black woman?

When it comes to black women, there’s one thing men know (or at least they should know), and that’s never to mess with their hair. Our hair is our crown, our pride and joy. And for a black woman especially, it’s something we put almost all our energy into (and sometimes copious amounts of money) when it comes to maintenance. So how exactly would a woman who cares more about her hair than anything else, have sex in the shower?

Now, I’m one to experiment and speak based on experience rather than research and let me tell you, it’s not easy. Unless you’re extremely comfortable with your partner and you’re moving straight from the bedroom into the shower (with a doek on of course), then using a shower cap, is not a real thing. A shower cap kills the vibe, it’s not too appealing at all and it definitely cuts into “fvcking” time because chances are, it’s something that will have to be looked for (unless you’re in a hotel) as it’s not something that’s commonly used anymore.

Then there is the question of protection. Now, I’m not one to go around promoting unsafe sex, but let’s be realistic; sh.t happens. So unless you’re going in lit (and no, having sex in the shower does not prevent pregnancy or disease), at what point does one put the condom on? Would a water based condom be safer? Well, using a sufficient amount of lube, in any instance, can reduce the risk of the condom breaking. In the shower, it’s safe to say that the water will wash the lubricant off. So it’s wiser to use more than usual when coming into contact with water. Also, beware of soaps (when soaping each other up), that may contain some ingredients that could break down the condom, making the chances of breakage higher.

Speaking of high, what does one do when they prefer cooler temperatures when in the shower, and vice versa? I would recommend a compromise. When you’re in the moment and enjoying one another, a tepid/lukewarm temperature is always wiser cos you can create the steam yourself anyway if you like things hot. The discussion of who will win in the heat department is not one that should be had when you’re about to get into it. Besides, the fact that it’s a very childish argument, it’s also something that could potentially turn both of you off when it’s easily avoidable.

Personally, besides when every sexual experience is planned to the T, I don’t see how sex in the shower can go off without a glitch, especially for a black woman and her hair. But if you’re still concerned about the state of your hair when it comes to sex, then maybe you need to reevaluate your partner because I can guarantee, when it’s good, my hair is the last thing on my mind.

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